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The Anger Epidemic: Why 68% of Australians Are Angrier Than Ever (And What Actually Works)
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Here's the thing about anger that nobody wants to admit: we're all getting worse at it.
Not worse at being angry—crikey, we've mastered that part. I'm talking about managing the bloody thing. After seventeen years of running leadership workshops across Sydney, Melbourne, and Brisbane, I can tell you that anger management has become the elephant in every boardroom, every family dinner, and definitely every Zoom call that could've been an email.
The stats are staggering. Nearly three-quarters of working Australians report feeling more irritable now than they did five years ago. Yet most companies still treat anger like it's some personal failing rather than what it actually is: a completely normal human response to increasingly abnormal circumstances.
Let me share something that'll probably ruffle a few feathers. The traditional "count to ten" advice? Complete garbage for anyone who's genuinely triggered.
When your colleague interrupts you for the fourth time in a meeting, or your teenager leaves dirty dishes in the sink again after you've asked them seventeen times, counting to ten just gives your anger time to marinate. What actually works is immediate pattern interruption—something I learned the hard way after losing my cool spectacularly during a client presentation back in 2019.
The incident involved a project manager who kept contradicting every suggestion I made, despite having zero experience in change management. By the third interruption, I'd had enough. Instead of maintaining professional composure, I basically told him his ideas were about as useful as a chocolate teapot. In front of twelve senior executives.
Not my finest moment.
But here's what that disaster taught me: anger isn't the enemy. Unmanaged anger is.
The Real Problem With Modern Anger
We've created this bizarre culture where expressing frustration makes you "unprofessional" while quietly seething makes you "resilient." This is backwards thinking that's literally making us sicker.
Research from Melbourne University shows that suppressed anger contributes to everything from hypertension to workplace burnout. Yet we keep telling people to "stay positive" when someone's being an absolute nightmare to work with.
The truth? Some situations deserve your anger.
When someone consistently disrespects your time, undermines your authority, or treats service staff poorly, getting angry is the appropriate response. The question isn't whether you should feel angry—it's what you do with that energy.
Here's where most anger management courses get it wrong. They focus on elimination rather than redirection. They want you to become some zen master who never gets ruffled. But successful people—the ones running companies, closing deals, and actually getting things done—they get angry. They just channel it effectively.
Take Richard Branson. The bloke's built an empire partly because he gets properly fired up about poor customer service. But instead of screaming at staff, he uses that frustration to revolutionise entire industries. Virgin Airlines exists because Branson got angry about how terribly other airlines treated passengers.
That's productive anger.
The Home vs Work Anger Disconnect
One thing that drives me mental is how differently people handle anger at home versus at work. At work, they'll bite their tongue until it bleeds. At home, they explode over trivial things because they've been bottling everything up all day.
This compartmentalisation is killing Australian families.
Your anger doesn't recognise the difference between your kitchen and your cubicle. If you're suppressing it in one environment, it's going to leak out somewhere else. Usually on the people who matter most.
I see this constantly in my workshops. A manager will tell me they "never lose their temper at work" then admit they snapped at their kids three times last week. They think they're being professional, but they're actually being cowardly.
Real professionalism means addressing workplace frustrations directly and constructively, not saving them up to dump on your family later.
The Australian Anger Style
We Aussies have a particular relationship with anger that's both blessing and curse. We pride ourselves on being laid-back, but when we finally crack, we really crack. The "she'll be right" mentality works until it doesn't.
I've seen grown men in suits completely lose it over printer jams because they've been swallowing their frustration for months. Meanwhile, their European colleagues express irritation immediately and move on.
There's wisdom in the immediate response, even if it goes against our cultural grain.
What Actually Works: The STORM Method
After years of trial and error (mostly error), I've developed what I call the STORM approach:
Stop the escalation immediately. Not count to ten—actually interrupt your own pattern. I teach people to literally say "pause" out loud. Sounds ridiculous until you try it.
Take ownership of your emotional state. Your anger belongs to you, regardless of what triggered it. This isn't about blame—it's about control.
Observe what's really happening beneath the surface. Are you angry about the situation, or are you angry about feeling powerless? Usually it's the latter.
Respond with intention rather than reaction. Ask yourself: what outcome do I actually want here?
Move forward with that specific goal in mind.
The beauty of STORM is that it works whether you're dealing with a difficult team member or trying to get your teenager to clean their room. The principles remain the same.
The Workplace Application
In professional settings, anger often stems from three sources: feeling unheard, feeling disrespected, or feeling overwhelmed. Sometimes all three simultaneously.
Smart managers recognise these triggers and address them before they explode. They create systems where people can express frustration safely and early. They don't wait for the annual review to mention that Bob's constant interrupting is driving everyone bonkers.
Here's something that might surprise you: some of the most effective leaders I know have terrible tempers. But they've learned to harness that intensity for positive change rather than letting it destroy relationships.
Consider this scenario: your team consistently misses deadlines because they're overcommitted. You have two choices. Option one: smile politely while projects fail and stress levels skyrocket. Option two: get appropriately angry about the situation and demand better systems.
Option two creates sustainable change. Option one creates quiet desperation.
The Family Factor
At home, the rules shift but the principles don't. Family members deserve the same respect you'd give a colleague—arguably more.
Yet I constantly meet people who speak to their partners in ways that would get them fired from any decent workplace. They justify it as "being comfortable" or "letting their guard down."
Comfort shouldn't mean cruelty.
The most successful approach I've seen involves treating family conflicts like business negotiations. What does each party need? What are the non-negotiables? How can we solve this practically rather than emotionally?
This doesn't mean becoming robotic at home. It means applying the same problem-solving skills that make you effective at work to the relationships that actually matter.
The Technology Factor
Here's something that wasn't an issue when I started consulting: digital anger. Email rage, social media fury, and the particular frustration of trying to have nuanced conversations via text message.
Technology has shortened our fuses while simultaneously reducing our ability to read emotional cues. We're angrier and worse at resolving that anger than ever before.
My rule: if you wouldn't say it to someone's face, don't type it. If you're angry enough to send a nasty email, write it first but save it as a draft. Come back in an hour. 99% of the time, you'll delete it.
The 1% when you do send it? Make sure it's worth the consequences.
The Long Game
Managing anger effectively isn't about becoming some emotionless robot who never gets upset. It's about becoming someone whose anger serves their goals rather than sabotaging them.
This takes practice. You'll mess up occasionally. I certainly still do.
But the difference between someone who manages anger well and someone who doesn't isn't perfection—it's recovery time. How quickly can you recognise you've overreacted, take responsibility, and get back on track?
The best leaders, partners, and parents I know aren't the ones who never get angry. They're the ones who get angry about the right things, express it constructively, and channel that energy into making things better.
Because here's the final truth about anger: it's information. It tells you that something matters to you. The question is whether you're going to use that information wisely or let it use you.
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